The Adventures of a Great Pretender

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isurvivedthekobayashimaru:

I was at walmart the other day, and I was sitting on a bench waiting for my mom to pay, and I was braiding my hair because that’s something I do when I’m bored, and this dude walks by and says, “hey baby, what else can you do with your hands?” I gave him my most polite smile and said in the sweetest way possible, “strangle you.

And I think I actually scared him because his eyes got kind of wide and he just walked away.

(Source: shesdonejim, via nerdycommunity)

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dirkinabox:

Do you ever see a post on your dash and literally say “shut up” out loud

(via tigerbun)

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Permalink poisoncage:

I should be  working and  filling  administration paper <_<…… FAILEDI plan to make those two sides ( with the back of the characters not two front)
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awesomephilia:

awesomephilia:

When I write a very witty text post and only 1 person likes it

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well this is ironic

(via tigerbun)

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poly-morph:

ferelden:

do you ever hear the intro theme to a video game and you get really emotional and your heart feels really weak like it’s coming back home and it’s basically like that whole world you love so much summed up into one epic song and you just want to fucking cry a lot because this is the video game for you and nothing else ever can even compare to the feeling you get when you hear that one fucking bit of music

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iamtonysexual:

jonandtheon:

jonandtheon:

jonandtheon:

MY BOOK IS LOCKED IN A CLASSROOMN

RED ASLERT

I TOLD THIS REALLY NICE KID WHO NEVER CAUSES TROUBLE AND HEREACHED INTO HIS BACKPACK AND PULLED OUT A KEYCHAIN WITH KEYS TO THE CLASSROOM AND UNLOCKED IT FOR ME??

update i asked him why he had those keys and he said “its not important” im so lost

He’ll be vital to your quest later, don’t forget about him.

(via nerdycommunity)

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betterlockthetardis:

dealwithlarry:

captainmjolnir:

I’ve never understood the stereotype that women are more likely to faint at blood

I mean seriously

what do you think we do every month

yeah i mean when i turn into a werewolf at the full moon and go hunting for human hearts to eat i’m fine

it got better

(via nerdycommunity)